It's ironic that, a year and a half ago, I was writing "Last. Post. Ever." I guess some things never really end.

I wish I had a TARDIS right now, then I could be everywhere and everywhen at once. Time travelling could be fun.

My building here is beginning to sound like 1st yr halls; not QUITE as loud but there's still the sound of people wandering around. I like being in a big building. Perhaps there's so many people but I also have my own space.

Yes, I'm resurrecting this once and for all, because it's easier than a diary.

I'm meeting Jess tomorrow at some coffee shop near town. Fun :)

I've decided to go to: Table Tennis, Fiddlers, Anime/Manga, CU (some things only once a fortnight as they're on the same nights). I even ordered my own table tennis bat tonight :)

My legs hurt from doing so much cycling in the 'deen but tomorrow I'm walking instead. Can't be bothered with the bike in town. Oh whoops I left it outside instead of in the shed. Oh well. I'm also having a major lie-in! Nothing to do before midday :)

Right I'm exhausted so off to bed must I go!

Pokemon

I took this quiz tonight;

BUG! Absorbed in your own idea of the world around you, you often find yourself immune to the foolhardiness and vindictive behaviour of others. Although you have a tendency to cross the line and offend others with your behaviour, your pure intentions are obvious. What Kind Of Pokémon Are You?

I'm not sure if it's quite good, but anyways. I can't wait to get a DS and then I can play Pokemon to my little heart's content :) I used to love the Pokemon anime when I was in Primary School, but I had to love it in secret because my friends hated it. I also secretly collected the cards, but it was hard because I couldn't trade any (what with the friends not liking it and me wanting it to be a secret!). I still have my cards, but the collection looks very pathetic...

:)

Laptops

Looks like I'm going to have to buy a new laptop... right as the Currys online clearance sale has finished.

Drat.

Can't get the one I wanted, but there's some pretty nice ones within my price range anyways.

:)

The unhelpful heritage vanishes...

The Resurrection Rock

Well, it's taken me a while to decide to do this, but I'm resurrecting the old blog.

Yes, I'm back in action on the old blogosphere!

And I'll start with quite a meaningful post, undoubtedly copied from the current BT advert.

When your world trembles and quakes
And your footing suddenly shifts and shakes
Take my hand
We’ll hide in the corner… hide in corner
Take my hand
We’ll hide ‘til it’s over… ’til it’s all over

lalalalala lalalalala

We have choices to make
We have promises that we can’t break
There is nothing left to lose
So hold on to me, I’ll hold on to you

Take my hand
We’ll hide in the corner… hide in corner
Take my hand
We’ll hide ‘til it’s over… ’til it’s all over

lalalalala lalalalala

- Allie Moss - Corner

(to my Superman).

Last. Post. Ever.

(on this blog).

This isn't out of spite and it isn't me "pining" for you or whatever it is you think I'm doing.

All I needed was support. All I wanted was understanding. You gave me support, then you didn't, then you did, then you didn't, then you did, then you didn't, then you did, then you didn't, then you did, then you didn't, then you did, then you said you didn't care about me any more. Then you ignored me.

All I wanted was to talk to you. All I wanted was my "best friend" back. I needed my uni best friend, as we all do.

I know that I did and said things I'm not proud of too. You don't need to tell me I wasn't perfect. I apologised and you told me everything was ok. A week before you broke up with me, you said you weren't going to do just that. Nothing changed after that first breakup, but that's because you broke up with me. I was just getting to the point of being able to be happy again - your patience was beginning to pay off - then it put me right back to square one. I heard after Easter that you got back together with me that first time because of how you felt about me, but I never heard that from you. You can't expect me to suddenly be happy, especially whenever the reasons you gave were things I'm really insecure about anyway. It doesn't matter how long I've known people for, I can't talk in groups when I get stressed.

I know I was childish, but you were too. I know I treated you like crap, but you did likewise. You had me convinced that we got through all the arguments, all the tantrums, all the crap. What's the point in working it all out if in the end it was all in vain? What's the point in getting through it if there's nothing to show for it?

You have no idea how much my life has affected my personality. I wanted to be let into your life so that you could show me how it has affected you, and I let you in to every part of my life because I wanted you to understand me. Nothing could ever have been worked through properly if we didn't understand each other. I am nothing like my past - except when I stress myself out far beyond what I can handle. You know what I was like when I was happy. You have no idea what it's like to experience severe anxiety every day and not even know what it's called because you've never experienced it before.

You told me a lot after Christmas that you loved me. Then you told me that you had wanted to break up with me since Christmas. Those two things are very much mutually exclusive. No-one can love someone at the same time as wanting to break up with them. So which one was the lie? You had told me over Christmas that we could spend next Christmas together, the one that has just passed.

You told me I was perfect. Exactly. You were looking for something perfect, not something proper. Relationships are never perfect, but they are usually worth working through all the crap to get to the good part. I told you time and time again that it would get better over the summer when we had a chance to relax, and this year when we weren't living virtually on each other's doorsteps in a very stressful environment. I wasn't "clingy," I just needed you because of how I felt. You knew how I felt. Why was it that whenever you fought for us that was ok, but whenever I fought for us you didn't care?

I can't believe how much you lied to me. I can't believe how much of a joke you made me into. I can't believe how someone like you can stand there and think you're better than me, when I was falling apart. I can't believe how I still believe in you and believe you can be a nice person.

I got over the relationship months ago. I just can't get over the preceding friendship and all the lies. That's because nothing has ever been resolved.

One Year.

So much can change in one year.

So much can be lost and so much can be gained.

Time, money, friendships, relationships, faith, hope, love, happiness, joy, maturity, Sense and Sensibility (see what I did? lol).

A good year can bring you to right where you want to be and where you should be, but a bad year can set you back decades.

Swine Flu

Sounds like a fun game... http://www.miniclip.com/games/sneeze/en/

"Help to prevent the spread of the swine flu by catching your sneezes with a tissue and then washing your hands."